When you lose something, what pops in your mind for the first time? Beefing about the situation? Blaming yourself for not being careful? Get angry to people around you? In my case, I wouldn’t even think anything. Really. Because I would be too busy to think where did I left it. Because most of the time I could not even remember where was the last time I put my thing. Sometime I even don’t realize that I leave my stuff somewhere and it goes somewhere.
Recently I lost my textbook. I lost it when I really need it to study. I brought it to my class on Thursday, brought it a long with me for the whole day until I got back to my room at night. On the next day busy with another activities in the weekend (my weekend starts on Friday, anyway). Finally on Sunday night when I was going to study for the subject, I couldn’t find the book in any corner of my room. Where on earth is my book? I hardly tried to remember all things I did on Thursday. I didn’t remember anything. I sat down, chilling out myself. Realizing that I had left my statistics book somewhere in my campus while I just knew it after three days. So terrible.
In other time, I lost my flashdrive in the same pattern. I left it somewhere, didn’t realize it until I was going to use it few days after. I sighed. At the same week a I decided to buy a new one with a bigger capacity, considering that I need a flashdrive for academic and organization activities while I also don’t have external harddisk. Eight gb flashdrive, and it wasn’t that cheap. Can you guess what happened in the next? Again, I left it somewhere. Just three weeks after I bought it.
I am indeed careless and absent-minded. However I did my ikhtiar. I traced for my book in all ways and road I take from my mahalla to the faculty. I got nothing. I searched my flashdrive everywhere,asking all my friends if they borrowed it. No answer.
Two days ago, I went to see the head of our computer lab technician. I asked if someone found my flashdrive and gave it to him. He then showed me few flashdrive that he found, and guess what? I saw one black-white flashdrive ADATA brand. In a blinked eye I knew it’s mine. I just knew it. And it is,MINE. The funny thing is, that ADATA flashdrive is my first lost flashdrive which has been gone for like, one month ago. I asked about my another flashdrive and they said the didn’t find any!!!
I wanted to say ‘alhamdulillah’ but then I wondered ‘why couldn’t I find the 8gb flashdrive and instead found the 2gb?’. I was going to complain, but then again ‘why couldn’t I be grateful for getting my old flashdrive back instead of buying a new one?’. Another question came in mind, ‘why I am so careless?why I always lose my stuffs?’. All feelings mixed in my head.
Allah always gives us what we need, not what we want. Sometimes the things we want are not god for us, Allah knows why. We will never know until we go through it and learn from it. Did I learn something from this? Or I just curse in the dark I created and keep falling down?
Falling is not always bad if we can know our fault. But the lesson will not be learned if we keep complaining. Try to find a light from it. Get the lesson, learn it. and it applies for every aspect in our life which we might have been complaining about. Why couldn’t I win this competition, why couldn’t get into this university, why can’t I go to the beach for my holiday and etc. those questions will keep coming and we won’t get to enjoy our life anymore. So sad right?
I can’t be careless anymore. It is good that I got my old flashdrive in my hand, maybe Allah doesn’t want me to keep a lot of movie in it. Who knows? *chuckles*